Religion

Sunday School
Nine year old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then he used his walkie - talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved." "Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked.

"Well, no, Mom. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!"

Nuns In Heaven
Three nuns are in a car accident and all three die. They go to the gates of heaven where StPeter greets them. He explains to them that to enter heaven they each must answer a question. If they have the right answer they can then enter. He asks the first nun :"who was the first man on earth ?" The first nun replies :"that's easy, it was Adam" The bells ring and the gates to heaven open so she may enter the kingdom of God. St-Peter then asks the second nun :"who was the first woman on earth ?" The second nun replies :"that's easy, it was Eve " The bells ring and the gates to heaven open so she may enter the kingdom of God. St-Peter approaches the third nun and asks :"what is the first thing Eve said to Adam ?" The nun is thinking about an answer and says outloud :"that's a hard one" And the bells ring and the gates to heaven open ....

Sodomy
James A retired priest is called in to substitute while the regular parish priest is out of town. While hearing confession, a parishioner confesses to sodomy, and the retired priest can't remember the proper pennance for sodomy. So he leans out of the confessional and asks an altar boy, "What does Father O'Malley give for sodomy?" The altar boy replies,

"Well, usually he gives us a candy bar and a coke."

Humor Sections

Get Me Back To The Lerts Lair Homepage!